Living again.

21st June 2010. 12:04p.m.

Today, I think I made some progress. Was able to keep my mind focused enough to talk to God, and I hope it’ll only get better.
I’ve been doing okay, just okay. Two or three nights ago, i was dreaming about it, kind of, and I woke up feeling ...bla. As in really, can I not have my dreams to myself again? I’m working on it. Working on getting my life back together. Baby steps though.
We were supposed to have 2 tests today, thankfully they did not hold, cos I was like half ready for one, and quarter ready for the other. Its amazing how very soon I will no longer be kemi the undergraduate. Will soon be kemi, the graduate. Am I totally psyched about this? Not particularly. Maybe because I don’t see what the hype is all about. Maybe cos with all the stress of school, I kind of enjoy it... boring lectures, not-so-boring lecturers, registration, frustrated middle-aged men and women, the suffering, the fun, the laughs. It’s all part of the process, and I am an ardent believer in enjoying the process. Maybe sometime soon, when I am able, I will analyse my journey through this school, the changes in me, the lessons and all that. But write now, there are many things i’ll rather not be thinking about at the moment. What I do need to think about, is my project, staring me in the face, reminding me of the deadline, and urging me to put in a truck load of work. By God’s grace, it will all pay off.
Living again just might be okay...baby step by baby step.