My mother is awesome. I mean, I know most people go on about how they have the best mum in the world, but my Ma is truly special. And most times, you might not get the importance of something until the possibility of its loss stares you in the face.
The time had come for me to get a new phone. So in my choice of this accessory, I felt like such a sell-out to myself and my principles. People that know me know that I’m not the greatest fan of the Blackberry. Even more importantly, I seriously dislike anything second-hand, or used, except maybe its a really good car.
With this in mind, you can imagine my displeasure when I had to settle for a somewhat used...let me stop being nice... a SECOND HAND Blackberry! But I fully blame that condition that makes the crayfish bend. I thought perhaps the BB would be my best bet if I hope to stay in touch with my university buddies. So I decided, what the heck? Might as well give it a shot. And I didn’t have much time to save up properly because my father who gave me a fraction of what I needed was already asking about the new phone.
Anyway, when I did get the phone, my dad, in his typical fashion, totally attacked my choice, and i was not really expecting anything different. Thankfully, he did not know of its second-handedness, if not, I would have really heard it.
My mum on the other hand was cool about it, but apparently, she detests second hand phones more than I do. So, the following day, my Ma decided that she would give me the money I needed to get a brand new one.
You might be wondering, what’s so special about this? You see, the reason why this was a huge gesture for me was because she has been under alot of financial stress, and I do mean a lot! This second hand vehicle that she just got for work purposes has had one problem or the other cropping up everywhere (surprise surprise!), amongst other things. So there’s a reason I did not ask her for money to buy the phone. She could have said, child, manage whatever you have, get a cheaper phone, or something that would probably have been justified. But she was willing to help out, because she knew it would make me happy. The fact that she was willing to put down something just so I could get the best of what i wanted was just so amazing. It made me remember other times when this lady would bend over backwards just so her children could be happy. She would deny herself of stuff, work hard, just to see us smiling and make sure we get the best of things. Then I decided, that by God’s special grace, my mum is going to be very comfortable and happy old lady. Like i will do everything in my power to make sure she is very comfortable and lives a good life. I’ll try my best to make her real proud of me. Even though I know her investments are based solely on love and not on some desire to reap in the future, she will most definitely reap. And to the best of my ability, I will not let anyone deprive my mother of seeing her children prosperous, simply because of their stubborn, irritatingly egotistical and I-know -everything attitude. Gosh, human beings are so myopic sometimes, and the ones that should know better are so painfully clueless...
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
just wondering.
They say you should let sleeping dogs lie. Somehow, i find that I'll rather wake the silly dog, get my answers from it, maybe rough things up in the process. I just don't know how to let things go without it being sorted. Maybe someday I'll learn. Maybe not.
I remembered this now cos of this slightly annoying conversation i was having. like of all topics to discuss, why do you have to bring that up? But you did, and now it got me thinking, and now I'll like to get it off my chest.
Dear Sir, you have mentioned, more than once, how i left you. How i broke your heart. So that an outsider looking in would think this girl was some heartless ingrate who ripped out the heart of the love of her life and walked into the sunset.
Forgive me if I'm wrong, but the way i remember it, i could not end it, because i did not want to end it. In fact, i remember calling back, the morning after, and begging that we should try. I'll try not to dwell too much on the subsequent times that i called, and begged and all of that.
Why then do you insist that i broke your heart, like i took a deliberate decision that led to your heartbreak? Why do you mention it in your ode, in that round-about way where you say you are not really saying it?
I might be wrong, and i'm willing to take full responsibility, as i have done over the past six months.
But i'm thinking about it really, that in the light of the circumstances, would it really be fair to say i walked away from you, and i broke your heart? Because if for the sake of saying, i did walk away after that conversation, i came right back, but you refused to take me back.
I'm not trying to point fingers, or make you feel bad, or any such thing. Lord knows this is the very last subject that i want to be writing about. I just could not shake it. And you know me, that when i cant shake something, i have to let it out.
Please, if you can bear to, think about it, and decide in your mind if i really deserve the burden of blame that has been placed at my feet.
I remembered this now cos of this slightly annoying conversation i was having. like of all topics to discuss, why do you have to bring that up? But you did, and now it got me thinking, and now I'll like to get it off my chest.
Dear Sir, you have mentioned, more than once, how i left you. How i broke your heart. So that an outsider looking in would think this girl was some heartless ingrate who ripped out the heart of the love of her life and walked into the sunset.
Forgive me if I'm wrong, but the way i remember it, i could not end it, because i did not want to end it. In fact, i remember calling back, the morning after, and begging that we should try. I'll try not to dwell too much on the subsequent times that i called, and begged and all of that.
Why then do you insist that i broke your heart, like i took a deliberate decision that led to your heartbreak? Why do you mention it in your ode, in that round-about way where you say you are not really saying it?
I might be wrong, and i'm willing to take full responsibility, as i have done over the past six months.
But i'm thinking about it really, that in the light of the circumstances, would it really be fair to say i walked away from you, and i broke your heart? Because if for the sake of saying, i did walk away after that conversation, i came right back, but you refused to take me back.
I'm not trying to point fingers, or make you feel bad, or any such thing. Lord knows this is the very last subject that i want to be writing about. I just could not shake it. And you know me, that when i cant shake something, i have to let it out.
Please, if you can bear to, think about it, and decide in your mind if i really deserve the burden of blame that has been placed at my feet.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Foolish.
Foolish.
Woke up that morning, thinking, darn, it’s today.
Now it would appear, that I’ve been a fool in many ways.
Foolish to think one time I could wing it
Foolish to think I was that strong
Foolish to not think, when I needed to think
Foolish to get us undone
Foolish to think I would not love you
Foolish to think you would not change
From being a just a nice fellow in my life,
To being the only one I cared to think about
Foolish for being so insensitive
Foolish for hurting you so
Foolish for not starting the fight early
At least we would have had more joys than pain
Foolish to think I could undo what I had done
Foolish to think I would stand
When once again I did a thoughtless act
And this time, you were gone for good
Foolish to think I would be okay
Foolish to think I wouldn’t cry
Foolish to think my life would be fine
When my sunshine just walked out.
Foolish to underestimate our love
Foolish to think you would forget
Foolish to think I would cease to matter
Foolish to think you would not hurt, half as much as I was hurting
Foolish to underestimate you, as much as I did me.
Am I foolish to try to live, am I foolish to be unable to forget
Am I the greatest fool in the world, because I cant help hoping, that one day...
Let it be then, let the world label me fool. Let me hope, till there’s nothing else to hope for.
Try and stop my heart if you can, try and tell it, stop beating for him! Try and tell my memories to leave me, try and tell my soul not to care.
Because as hard as you try, you will find that they don’t listen. As much as you scream, you will find one simple truth.
The love which we speak of, is nothing short of unusual. The love which we speak of, it refuses to cease. This love is willing to wait, until it can wait no more.
Let me be foolish, let me be silly. Let the world move on, my heart remains still.
Woke up that morning, thinking, darn, it’s today.
Now it would appear, that I’ve been a fool in many ways.
Foolish to think one time I could wing it
Foolish to think I was that strong
Foolish to not think, when I needed to think
Foolish to get us undone
Foolish to think I would not love you
Foolish to think you would not change
From being a just a nice fellow in my life,
To being the only one I cared to think about
Foolish for being so insensitive
Foolish for hurting you so
Foolish for not starting the fight early
At least we would have had more joys than pain
Foolish to think I could undo what I had done
Foolish to think I would stand
When once again I did a thoughtless act
And this time, you were gone for good
Foolish to think I would be okay
Foolish to think I wouldn’t cry
Foolish to think my life would be fine
When my sunshine just walked out.
Foolish to underestimate our love
Foolish to think you would forget
Foolish to think I would cease to matter
Foolish to think you would not hurt, half as much as I was hurting
Foolish to underestimate you, as much as I did me.
Am I foolish to try to live, am I foolish to be unable to forget
Am I the greatest fool in the world, because I cant help hoping, that one day...
Let it be then, let the world label me fool. Let me hope, till there’s nothing else to hope for.
Try and stop my heart if you can, try and tell it, stop beating for him! Try and tell my memories to leave me, try and tell my soul not to care.
Because as hard as you try, you will find that they don’t listen. As much as you scream, you will find one simple truth.
The love which we speak of, is nothing short of unusual. The love which we speak of, it refuses to cease. This love is willing to wait, until it can wait no more.
Let me be foolish, let me be silly. Let the world move on, my heart remains still.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Randomz...
Geez... i remember the weirdest things...some stuff that i’m better off forgetting. Is it a blessing or a curse? Depends on how i choose to see it really... Blessing, in that I remember, and I work through it, get stronger with it, or try to put it out of my mind, or just overcome it. Curse, in that it could ruin the rest of my day, get me depressed, throw rocks in my garri, that kinda thing.
Ah well, i guess I’ll just have to live through it somehow, and hope it does not happen every single year.
So today, of all days, I had an epiphany,i think, some sort of realisation that came across as I foolishly embraced an old habit. It did feel like an epiphany, but it needs time to prove itself. Hopefully it is what I hope it is, and not just a shot of hormones sending messages to my brain.
This law school posting ish is taking forever. Like seriously, what’s the suspense for? At this rate, when it finally comes out, i’ll be in a mad rush to get things sorted. I’m not looking forward to this at all, and I hope it comes out this week.
I was flipping through TELL Magazine (yes, I do try to keep myself abreast of interesting events..interesting being they key word here), and I came across the cover story, about the bombing on Independence day. What a way to clock 50. Turns out that there were actually warnings of its occurrence, three different warnings in fact. The US and the UK knew about, and informed the government twice before the event. It is only in Nigeria that with such a warning, and while showing off our ‘graceful’ military defence regalia, the explosions will still happen. Everybody is now pointing fingers at everybody. The major suspect according to the magazine is Henry Okah, a MEND affiliate who lives in South Africa and supplies ammunition. My mind then drifted to the Niger Delta, their situation, and the militants. All these people want is for the government to pay attention to their towns, to provide them with basic amenities so that they stop dying of various diseases and living in desolation. How can the people living in the source of most of the oil we have in this nation be in so much poverty and lack? It makes no sense whatsoever. One can see where these militants are coming from, trying to fight for a better life for their people.
Why are Nigerians so greedy and power hungry? How can leaders be so terribly selfish, so inanely myopic? I don’t get it at all. Its these kind of things that make us lose hope in Nigeria. During the independence day, quite frankly, other than giving God thanks for His mercies, i could not think of much to celebrate. People are dying, while others are making stupid money, using ridiculous sums to celebrate a farce. What can we show for our 50 years in existence?
These thoughts were on my mind when I had another epiphany...actually, this was the first epiphany before I had that of today.
I was in Redemption camp, when the national sports organisation or some such body came forward to honour Pastor Adeboye as the spiritual adviser or something. As the G.O came forward, what struck me was the fact that this man, despite the mess the nation is in, still believes in Nigeria. He prays endlessly, tirelessly for the restoration of this land. It was his faith that made me realise hat Nigeria is not the one with the problem. Nigeria as an entity is made up of great resources, great people (for the most part), enormous potential. It is the people in authority that are so horribly messed up. Nigeria belongs to us. Belongs to our fathers, our mothers, our children, brothers and sisters. So we can do either of two things really. We can keep pointing fingers, keep abusing the nation, keep saying all things negative and ultimately, we can flee, leaving the nation in the hands of the thieves to plunder to their heart’s content . Or, we can go the place of power, which is the place of prayer. We can keep beseeching God to have mercy on us. We can purge our own souls of the corruption that lies therein. Because the truth is that we shout and yell that are leaders are corrupt, but as young as we are, the corruption is below the surface, waiting to for the right opportunity to erupt. How do you explain student leaders on campuses blatantly stealing the money of their organisations and doctoring records to cover their tracks? Someone said that you should be the change you want to see in the world. If all the leaders die tomorrow, can we confidently say that the younger generation will do better? I certainly cannot. If you work in an office and you fill in false records of your arrival time, if you ask someone to fill in your name illegally so that you will get benefits you did not work for or deserve, if you add an extra zero behind that cheque or receipt for your gain, if you lie and cheat and manipulate your way to the top, if you justify bad habits instead of facing them and dealing with them, then you need to take a closer look in the mirror, because then, we will be no better than the Babangidas of this world, and we will only be making useless pretentious noise, not because we want the world to be a better place, but because we are not the ones who got the golden opportunity to loot and steal and get rich quickly.
Random thoughts that cross my mind on this day, of all days. If you are reading this, and you know who you are, I’m assuming you remember as I ask, it’s been quite a year, hasn’t it?
Ah well, i guess I’ll just have to live through it somehow, and hope it does not happen every single year.
So today, of all days, I had an epiphany,i think, some sort of realisation that came across as I foolishly embraced an old habit. It did feel like an epiphany, but it needs time to prove itself. Hopefully it is what I hope it is, and not just a shot of hormones sending messages to my brain.
This law school posting ish is taking forever. Like seriously, what’s the suspense for? At this rate, when it finally comes out, i’ll be in a mad rush to get things sorted. I’m not looking forward to this at all, and I hope it comes out this week.
I was flipping through TELL Magazine (yes, I do try to keep myself abreast of interesting events..interesting being they key word here), and I came across the cover story, about the bombing on Independence day. What a way to clock 50. Turns out that there were actually warnings of its occurrence, three different warnings in fact. The US and the UK knew about, and informed the government twice before the event. It is only in Nigeria that with such a warning, and while showing off our ‘graceful’ military defence regalia, the explosions will still happen. Everybody is now pointing fingers at everybody. The major suspect according to the magazine is Henry Okah, a MEND affiliate who lives in South Africa and supplies ammunition. My mind then drifted to the Niger Delta, their situation, and the militants. All these people want is for the government to pay attention to their towns, to provide them with basic amenities so that they stop dying of various diseases and living in desolation. How can the people living in the source of most of the oil we have in this nation be in so much poverty and lack? It makes no sense whatsoever. One can see where these militants are coming from, trying to fight for a better life for their people.
Why are Nigerians so greedy and power hungry? How can leaders be so terribly selfish, so inanely myopic? I don’t get it at all. Its these kind of things that make us lose hope in Nigeria. During the independence day, quite frankly, other than giving God thanks for His mercies, i could not think of much to celebrate. People are dying, while others are making stupid money, using ridiculous sums to celebrate a farce. What can we show for our 50 years in existence?
These thoughts were on my mind when I had another epiphany...actually, this was the first epiphany before I had that of today.
I was in Redemption camp, when the national sports organisation or some such body came forward to honour Pastor Adeboye as the spiritual adviser or something. As the G.O came forward, what struck me was the fact that this man, despite the mess the nation is in, still believes in Nigeria. He prays endlessly, tirelessly for the restoration of this land. It was his faith that made me realise hat Nigeria is not the one with the problem. Nigeria as an entity is made up of great resources, great people (for the most part), enormous potential. It is the people in authority that are so horribly messed up. Nigeria belongs to us. Belongs to our fathers, our mothers, our children, brothers and sisters. So we can do either of two things really. We can keep pointing fingers, keep abusing the nation, keep saying all things negative and ultimately, we can flee, leaving the nation in the hands of the thieves to plunder to their heart’s content . Or, we can go the place of power, which is the place of prayer. We can keep beseeching God to have mercy on us. We can purge our own souls of the corruption that lies therein. Because the truth is that we shout and yell that are leaders are corrupt, but as young as we are, the corruption is below the surface, waiting to for the right opportunity to erupt. How do you explain student leaders on campuses blatantly stealing the money of their organisations and doctoring records to cover their tracks? Someone said that you should be the change you want to see in the world. If all the leaders die tomorrow, can we confidently say that the younger generation will do better? I certainly cannot. If you work in an office and you fill in false records of your arrival time, if you ask someone to fill in your name illegally so that you will get benefits you did not work for or deserve, if you add an extra zero behind that cheque or receipt for your gain, if you lie and cheat and manipulate your way to the top, if you justify bad habits instead of facing them and dealing with them, then you need to take a closer look in the mirror, because then, we will be no better than the Babangidas of this world, and we will only be making useless pretentious noise, not because we want the world to be a better place, but because we are not the ones who got the golden opportunity to loot and steal and get rich quickly.
Random thoughts that cross my mind on this day, of all days. If you are reading this, and you know who you are, I’m assuming you remember as I ask, it’s been quite a year, hasn’t it?
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Remembering...
Remembering.
For a day that was supposed to be fun, today was pretty darn stressful. In my tired state, I began to reflect on my university experience, at least some parts of it. So today, I’m gonna write about some really good times I can remember. Hopefully in the future, when I’m real busy, or working very hard, or just swamped with this and that, I can take time out to read it and smile. Here goes...
Year 1.
My best memories here centre mostly on opard. We used to hang out quite a lot back then, and I can say he was pretty much my first real friend in unilag. We would walk around, talking about his many philosophies, or rather, he was educating me about them. He used to sing the weirdest songs too. I remember one day, I was feeling rather gloomy, for reasons i cannot remember and my good friend Opard broke out into one of his many songs, and I laughed so much, all the gloom disappeared. It was like a ray of sunshine on a very cloudy day. Yes. My first year was good. I had Opard in it, and I would not trade him for the world.
Year 2.
Hmmm...somehow myself and opard where not as close as we used to be, I guess new situations and experiences came along. We even had a fight at the beginning of the session, but he taught me stuff, like when things are bad between you and a person, you don’t carry on as though things will never get better, or like you’ve totally given up on that person, unless of course you have.
One major thing I will never forget about this year was what was to be the beginnings of my reading adventure with Ekwi. You see, me and this girl started talking in year 1, but we got closer in this period, and we would read together. We all lamented that who sent us to read law, when we could have been happy dancing for grades or drawing or something, the suffering was still new to us. There was the street light episode, where we had to seat under the lamps at the centre of the road because there was no light anywhere else. I distinctly remember the incident where we had read all night, were very tired, and we had early morning papers. Exams were over for everyone else, so we, i.e my class mates were generally the only ones around. After we had taken a bath, we decided to attempt to rest for an hour before the paper. We even knelt down with our heads on the bed so we would not sleep too much. Apparently sleeping at all was a bad idea because by the time we woke up, we were in pain! Those were the beginnings of what we would call suffer-head days...
I cannot not mention my first real guy-experience that occurred in this year. It was the first time I had someone really like me..like he was quite besotted! It was nice to be able to make someone that happy. Apparently, I would later learn in my experiences, that I could make a person really sad too.
Year3.
As much as I would say that this year was not my best in many ways, I have some really good memories that I must not forget. This was the period in which I started talking with Icicles. Ii remember that after roda one day, he called me up after 12, and we chatted about all kinds of stuff. Little did I know that this was to become a constant occurrence. We would talk for nights at a stretch, many hours, then we would wake up with what i termed ‘talk hang-overs’. Those were fun times, perhaps the best in my entire 3rd year experience.
Year4.
I have two major events that I will always remember this year for: the moot competition and valentines day. I’ll start with the latter.
It has become something of a tradition for myself and my big sister to sacrifice sleep on the altar of business during valentines day. We work hard to bake those tasty chocolate cakes and get them all ready for that ‘special’ day. Anyways, vals day of year 4 was no exception. We had been up for two nights at a stretch and it was delivery time. The day started with a trip to idi-araba to drop off some cakes, then to unilag. There was so much traffic! I remember this because I was to run my errands quickly, then spend the rest of the day with Icicles. But traffic had its own plans. I was quite delayed in getting home, quite tired too. I remember that icicles came to my house to take me back to school, and I still had two stressful deliveries to make. In addition, it decided to rain on that day. He was gracious enough to take me on my delivery rounds, which were once again fraught with traffic. I also remember that there was no food anywhere. Now I’m sure your thinking, where is the good part? I’ll tell you in a bit. At the end of the day, when I was done with all the work and we had little hanging out time left, while I was thanking him for being so supportive and wot-not, he said to me, ‘ You’re everything I want, and then some.’ I don’t think I will ever forget that statement. Because it crowned the day with so much love, and it will go down in history as my best valentines day in unilag, and in my life so far. No one has ever said that to me. So saying it, and meaning it, totally transformed my day, heck , my life. It made me feel so good, and I replayed it over and over, and one day, I hope to God that I will be able to tell him the same thing, when all issues in heaven and on earth have been sorted out.
Next up, the moot competition. That was the first time I would represent unilag for anything. It was such a good experience, for two major reasons. First off, it brought me closer to my partner, Gbonka. I remember that we would wake up almost everyday for a month, head to the law annex, and begin practicing. We would read, memorise, watch a bit of the great debaters for inspiration, we would criticise, fumble, start again, it was amazing! Really good stuff I tell you. Even though we did not win, I was glad that I was able to stand before those foreign judges and not stutter. We made pretty good points, even won our rounds, the points were just not high enough for the finals.
I cannot not mention one of the most amazing lawyers that I had the privilege of meeting during the moot. Mr. Babatunde Irukera impressed me for many reasons. He had absolutely no reason to be there with us, teaching and coaching. He probably had better things to do with his time. But this man took it upon himself to share from his vast experience and properly tutor us in the art of advocacy. He was even willing to pull an all-nighter with us! I was amazed, like, are there really people like this in the world? He was extremely cool, very supportive, and even when we did not win, he still thought we were very good. One day soon, hopefully, I’ll get the chance to work a real life case with him. He, being a major part of my 400 level, definitely made it worthwhile.
Year 5.
Ah yes...the final year. I don’t think I’ll be forgetting this year in a hurry. Lets see...good memories...
Majorly, i will not forget my friendship with Gbonka. He helped me through some really hard times, and hanging with him was such fun. We would go on bread and sardine dates, work hard on my project, try out new food joints, have walking tutorial sessions, strategize on how to go about exams. He shared my burden of finishing with a good grade, and he believed with me. I will never forget the Sunday when I could not stay in my room, I was feeling really horrible, somewhat claustrophobic. I called him out of his room for the second time that day, and we walked to the senate. I remember we sat there, and I just wept, because I was so sad. He was just there, listening to me ramble on and cry, and he understood. He was one of the few people that actually got where I was coming from. Perhaps that night was the cement that sealed our friendship. I will certainly remember him fondly in my university experience.
One of the really good memories I have are of my final year dinner. I actually had a good time. After all the stress, it was really nice. The company, the food, the little after-party adventure, everything was just...fun. I wont expanciate much because I’ve done that already in my previous blog, but I can safely say, I made a good choice in dates.
Finally, I must write about the results. I will not forget it so easily because of how close i was to losing it. I mean, I could very easily have finished with a 2.2, the rate at which I was going. I filled my law school form and put a 2.1 as the class of degree because i was believing God for a miracle, and i most certainly got it. I don’t believe I have thanked Him enough for what He did for me. I will be eternally grateful to Him for His mercies.
My university years were nothing like I imagined it would be. But then, almost nothing is usually as i imagine. It’s usually better. Sometimes worse, but mostly better. It was a great learning experience, and I am truly thankful for everything.
For a day that was supposed to be fun, today was pretty darn stressful. In my tired state, I began to reflect on my university experience, at least some parts of it. So today, I’m gonna write about some really good times I can remember. Hopefully in the future, when I’m real busy, or working very hard, or just swamped with this and that, I can take time out to read it and smile. Here goes...
Year 1.
My best memories here centre mostly on opard. We used to hang out quite a lot back then, and I can say he was pretty much my first real friend in unilag. We would walk around, talking about his many philosophies, or rather, he was educating me about them. He used to sing the weirdest songs too. I remember one day, I was feeling rather gloomy, for reasons i cannot remember and my good friend Opard broke out into one of his many songs, and I laughed so much, all the gloom disappeared. It was like a ray of sunshine on a very cloudy day. Yes. My first year was good. I had Opard in it, and I would not trade him for the world.
Year 2.
Hmmm...somehow myself and opard where not as close as we used to be, I guess new situations and experiences came along. We even had a fight at the beginning of the session, but he taught me stuff, like when things are bad between you and a person, you don’t carry on as though things will never get better, or like you’ve totally given up on that person, unless of course you have.
One major thing I will never forget about this year was what was to be the beginnings of my reading adventure with Ekwi. You see, me and this girl started talking in year 1, but we got closer in this period, and we would read together. We all lamented that who sent us to read law, when we could have been happy dancing for grades or drawing or something, the suffering was still new to us. There was the street light episode, where we had to seat under the lamps at the centre of the road because there was no light anywhere else. I distinctly remember the incident where we had read all night, were very tired, and we had early morning papers. Exams were over for everyone else, so we, i.e my class mates were generally the only ones around. After we had taken a bath, we decided to attempt to rest for an hour before the paper. We even knelt down with our heads on the bed so we would not sleep too much. Apparently sleeping at all was a bad idea because by the time we woke up, we were in pain! Those were the beginnings of what we would call suffer-head days...
I cannot not mention my first real guy-experience that occurred in this year. It was the first time I had someone really like me..like he was quite besotted! It was nice to be able to make someone that happy. Apparently, I would later learn in my experiences, that I could make a person really sad too.
Year3.
As much as I would say that this year was not my best in many ways, I have some really good memories that I must not forget. This was the period in which I started talking with Icicles. Ii remember that after roda one day, he called me up after 12, and we chatted about all kinds of stuff. Little did I know that this was to become a constant occurrence. We would talk for nights at a stretch, many hours, then we would wake up with what i termed ‘talk hang-overs’. Those were fun times, perhaps the best in my entire 3rd year experience.
Year4.
I have two major events that I will always remember this year for: the moot competition and valentines day. I’ll start with the latter.
It has become something of a tradition for myself and my big sister to sacrifice sleep on the altar of business during valentines day. We work hard to bake those tasty chocolate cakes and get them all ready for that ‘special’ day. Anyways, vals day of year 4 was no exception. We had been up for two nights at a stretch and it was delivery time. The day started with a trip to idi-araba to drop off some cakes, then to unilag. There was so much traffic! I remember this because I was to run my errands quickly, then spend the rest of the day with Icicles. But traffic had its own plans. I was quite delayed in getting home, quite tired too. I remember that icicles came to my house to take me back to school, and I still had two stressful deliveries to make. In addition, it decided to rain on that day. He was gracious enough to take me on my delivery rounds, which were once again fraught with traffic. I also remember that there was no food anywhere. Now I’m sure your thinking, where is the good part? I’ll tell you in a bit. At the end of the day, when I was done with all the work and we had little hanging out time left, while I was thanking him for being so supportive and wot-not, he said to me, ‘ You’re everything I want, and then some.’ I don’t think I will ever forget that statement. Because it crowned the day with so much love, and it will go down in history as my best valentines day in unilag, and in my life so far. No one has ever said that to me. So saying it, and meaning it, totally transformed my day, heck , my life. It made me feel so good, and I replayed it over and over, and one day, I hope to God that I will be able to tell him the same thing, when all issues in heaven and on earth have been sorted out.
Next up, the moot competition. That was the first time I would represent unilag for anything. It was such a good experience, for two major reasons. First off, it brought me closer to my partner, Gbonka. I remember that we would wake up almost everyday for a month, head to the law annex, and begin practicing. We would read, memorise, watch a bit of the great debaters for inspiration, we would criticise, fumble, start again, it was amazing! Really good stuff I tell you. Even though we did not win, I was glad that I was able to stand before those foreign judges and not stutter. We made pretty good points, even won our rounds, the points were just not high enough for the finals.
I cannot not mention one of the most amazing lawyers that I had the privilege of meeting during the moot. Mr. Babatunde Irukera impressed me for many reasons. He had absolutely no reason to be there with us, teaching and coaching. He probably had better things to do with his time. But this man took it upon himself to share from his vast experience and properly tutor us in the art of advocacy. He was even willing to pull an all-nighter with us! I was amazed, like, are there really people like this in the world? He was extremely cool, very supportive, and even when we did not win, he still thought we were very good. One day soon, hopefully, I’ll get the chance to work a real life case with him. He, being a major part of my 400 level, definitely made it worthwhile.
Year 5.
Ah yes...the final year. I don’t think I’ll be forgetting this year in a hurry. Lets see...good memories...
Majorly, i will not forget my friendship with Gbonka. He helped me through some really hard times, and hanging with him was such fun. We would go on bread and sardine dates, work hard on my project, try out new food joints, have walking tutorial sessions, strategize on how to go about exams. He shared my burden of finishing with a good grade, and he believed with me. I will never forget the Sunday when I could not stay in my room, I was feeling really horrible, somewhat claustrophobic. I called him out of his room for the second time that day, and we walked to the senate. I remember we sat there, and I just wept, because I was so sad. He was just there, listening to me ramble on and cry, and he understood. He was one of the few people that actually got where I was coming from. Perhaps that night was the cement that sealed our friendship. I will certainly remember him fondly in my university experience.
One of the really good memories I have are of my final year dinner. I actually had a good time. After all the stress, it was really nice. The company, the food, the little after-party adventure, everything was just...fun. I wont expanciate much because I’ve done that already in my previous blog, but I can safely say, I made a good choice in dates.
Finally, I must write about the results. I will not forget it so easily because of how close i was to losing it. I mean, I could very easily have finished with a 2.2, the rate at which I was going. I filled my law school form and put a 2.1 as the class of degree because i was believing God for a miracle, and i most certainly got it. I don’t believe I have thanked Him enough for what He did for me. I will be eternally grateful to Him for His mercies.
My university years were nothing like I imagined it would be. But then, almost nothing is usually as i imagine. It’s usually better. Sometimes worse, but mostly better. It was a great learning experience, and I am truly thankful for everything.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
A Nightmare seeks to return!
Anyone who is in Nigeria and pays attention to his surroundings knows that it’s election season. Other than the daily prayer for Nigeria, I have not given it too much thought. Not until now anyways. And now its not that I’ve suddenly becoming politically inclined or especially interested, but I came across something that absolutely caught my fancy. Simply put, it was the gall, the effrontery, the audacity of a man, how a person could be so shameless.
I was looking through the TELL Magazine dated September 27 (they produce each one to last for a week), when I saw a special report written by some dude called Tunde Babatunde. This special feature was on Ibrahim Babangida, and his presidential ambition. The obviously well paid sell-out of a reporter took out time and effort to compile all of IBB’s ‘achievements’ when he was in power form 1985 to 1993. This feature, which took half of the magazine was ludicrous! I could not believe what I was reading! This reporter who was either unborn during IBB’s regime, or has suddenly developed selective amnesia, or just cares more for the well being of his pocket than for the future of his children, went on and on about how that period was Nigeria’s ‘golden age’. I thought, this guy has gotta be kidding! He listed the many great things that the tyrant did for this nation, stupid stupid things o, I might add, like development of science and technology, indigenization of the upstream petroleum industry (indeed...), agriculture, a steel plant that hardly even works, blah, blah, blah, things which are of no real consequence to the life and survival of a nation.Dear followers, it was quite a lot of crap that this reporter put up! Rubbish infrastructural facilities that this demon of a man allegedly put in place in Nigeria. Things that add absolutely n value to the well-being of the common man.
This dude had the gall to write that IBB is the best president that Nigerians are expecting. They went and dug up pictures of him with Margaret thatcher,of him laughing gleefully with Obasanjo...who gives a hoot? As if this was not bad enough, this Tunde Babatunde interviewed some mallams, also well paid no doubt, who opened their betraying mouths and were saying hogwash, like how IBB has the ability to rule Nigeria, how he is people oriented, how the masses are yearning for him. God forbid!!!
I wonder why they did not come to the south to get some opinions. The reporter would probably be tied to a stake and lynched.
I cant help wondering, what the heck is going on in that man’s head? Does he think Nigerians have forgotten the disasters which he single-handedly brought upon this land? Does he think we have forgotten the likes of Dele Giwa, and many others, whom he annihilated for speaking the truth? Does he really believe that he can bribe all of us with 5000 naira, which he probably wont even pay, so that we can sell our souls into slavery again? Now I get why some people could not find any pity in their hearts when his wife died. The woman went about doing this program and that movement, things which would have been absolutely unnecessary if her husband was not busy stealing all the nation’s resources.
Nigerians yearn for him a much as they yearn for poverty and death. He is a bigger idiot that I thought if he thinks the people have forgotten...because the people are like the mafia...we never forget. Not this kind of thing anyway. Not a blow that has left our nation crippled. Heck, we still feel the impact of the blow till today. It is obscene and downright insulting for a person like that to rare his head in public, not to mention contesting for the presidency.
Whatever ideas his ‘advisers’ have been feeding him with, whatever is giving him hope that he is not just wasting stolen money on a useless venture, will follow him to his grave and probably convince him that he is no invinsible he can fly.
However, It is between him and God what his judgement will be. In the meantime, his hope for return will not go past that. Hope. Not if we are still a people with reason and memory. And not if there is still a God alive in heaven, ruling in the affairs of men.
This nightmare needs to stay where it belongs: in the past, as a horrible experience which we suffered before, never to repeat itself.
I was looking through the TELL Magazine dated September 27 (they produce each one to last for a week), when I saw a special report written by some dude called Tunde Babatunde. This special feature was on Ibrahim Babangida, and his presidential ambition. The obviously well paid sell-out of a reporter took out time and effort to compile all of IBB’s ‘achievements’ when he was in power form 1985 to 1993. This feature, which took half of the magazine was ludicrous! I could not believe what I was reading! This reporter who was either unborn during IBB’s regime, or has suddenly developed selective amnesia, or just cares more for the well being of his pocket than for the future of his children, went on and on about how that period was Nigeria’s ‘golden age’. I thought, this guy has gotta be kidding! He listed the many great things that the tyrant did for this nation, stupid stupid things o, I might add, like development of science and technology, indigenization of the upstream petroleum industry (indeed...), agriculture, a steel plant that hardly even works, blah, blah, blah, things which are of no real consequence to the life and survival of a nation.Dear followers, it was quite a lot of crap that this reporter put up! Rubbish infrastructural facilities that this demon of a man allegedly put in place in Nigeria. Things that add absolutely n value to the well-being of the common man.
This dude had the gall to write that IBB is the best president that Nigerians are expecting. They went and dug up pictures of him with Margaret thatcher,of him laughing gleefully with Obasanjo...who gives a hoot? As if this was not bad enough, this Tunde Babatunde interviewed some mallams, also well paid no doubt, who opened their betraying mouths and were saying hogwash, like how IBB has the ability to rule Nigeria, how he is people oriented, how the masses are yearning for him. God forbid!!!
I wonder why they did not come to the south to get some opinions. The reporter would probably be tied to a stake and lynched.
I cant help wondering, what the heck is going on in that man’s head? Does he think Nigerians have forgotten the disasters which he single-handedly brought upon this land? Does he think we have forgotten the likes of Dele Giwa, and many others, whom he annihilated for speaking the truth? Does he really believe that he can bribe all of us with 5000 naira, which he probably wont even pay, so that we can sell our souls into slavery again? Now I get why some people could not find any pity in their hearts when his wife died. The woman went about doing this program and that movement, things which would have been absolutely unnecessary if her husband was not busy stealing all the nation’s resources.
Nigerians yearn for him a much as they yearn for poverty and death. He is a bigger idiot that I thought if he thinks the people have forgotten...because the people are like the mafia...we never forget. Not this kind of thing anyway. Not a blow that has left our nation crippled. Heck, we still feel the impact of the blow till today. It is obscene and downright insulting for a person like that to rare his head in public, not to mention contesting for the presidency.
Whatever ideas his ‘advisers’ have been feeding him with, whatever is giving him hope that he is not just wasting stolen money on a useless venture, will follow him to his grave and probably convince him that he is no invinsible he can fly.
However, It is between him and God what his judgement will be. In the meantime, his hope for return will not go past that. Hope. Not if we are still a people with reason and memory. And not if there is still a God alive in heaven, ruling in the affairs of men.
This nightmare needs to stay where it belongs: in the past, as a horrible experience which we suffered before, never to repeat itself.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
He did it.
He did it.
Finally, I can write about it. It’s almost unbelievable. But God did it. He actually did it for me! Wow...I’m listening to the songs I always listened to when I was hoping and trusting that He would give me a miracle, and now He has.
You may wonder what I am going on about. It’s my final year result! I finished with a 2.1. Now you may not realise the importance of this, so I will explain it to you.
Because of my history, I have always had some sort of expectation bestowed upon me. I did not really think I would have a problem living up to this expectation, at least where academics are concerned. I’ll like to believe I’m not a dull babe, and school work has never been that much of an issue for me. But somehow, i got majorly distracted, and my grades were on an almost steady decline, for one reason or the other. I’m pretty sure it was because God had said that I will never fail, that’s why I never ended up with a flat zero, or any carry-overs. Trust me, I do not give myself any credit for whatever success I have had, it’s absolutely all God.
Anyway, in my year one, my result was pretty good. Did not quite reach a first class, but along the line, I think hopes of a first class flew out of the window for all of us, so we all strived to maintain, and attain good second class uppers.
In year 2, my result received a big slap! It was the first time we were experiencing law, and the way questions were answered was just weird! But it was a learning process, and even God was rooting for me. I remember my contract exam. It was horrid! Like, I did not remember any cases, everything just flew out of my head! As God would have it, the exam questions leaked, so we had to rewrite it. This time, I was ready. We had to read under the street lights because there was no light in the entire school. I’m sure I would have had a bold zero if we had not redone that exam.
Year 3 was probably the year with the worst results. It’s sad how I cannot look back at that year and remember anything concrete that I did or gained. I was just floating, like a directionless confused human being. My result could best be described as mediocre. Very. One good thing that I can remember now that I think about it is that that was the year I started talking to icicles. Now that was definitely a good thing.
Year 4 was somewhat better. I had good influence, a good man who was always pushing me to work. My results that year were markedly better, except for one course that tried to screw me over. Thank God for God.
Now year 5 is the year I will never ever forget. The first semester was okay, except for yet another course that wanted to mess me up. Second semester was...unbelievable. It had to have been my most turbulent semester, heck, the most turbulent time in my young life! I was such a wreck at some point, it was amazing. I went from being claustrophobic, to sad, to desperate, to depressed, to crazyish... But somehow or the other, God was there with me, every single step of the way, even when I did not know that He was. You know the amazing thing? He started answering my prayers before I really started praying. Like I heard that in my jurisprudence, I had the highest score in the test. When I heard, i was like, what? Are you sure? Cos I did not remember that test being fantastic at all. I remember just sha writing stories, hoping they would make sense. And somehow, they did. And then I remember my Evidence. God had to have sent Prof Osibajo, cos that man is one heck of a lecturer! Because of Him, I understood the topic, and I loved my exam. As in, I actually loved it! It’s one of those papers i think back on fondly! Who does that? I guess I do. Evidence...I will never forget you. And my project. Hmm... I had this ‘wonderful’ lady for my supervisor, the kind that you are afraid to talk too much in her presence in case she gets mad and takes it out on your grade. Mehn, the Lord sha found a way to do it for me. Imagine, she did not look at the final project, she graded based on my past mistakes in the work! She’s one of those people I hope I meet in future, when I’m all rich and powerful , and when she does not have any kind of power over me anymore.
All in all, I had help. The Lord sent me all kinds of help. One major source was Gbonka. I think he will forever be my friend. He was there at my lowest point. He helped me through the project, from the beginning to the end. He was there, hoping with me, believing that i could do it, explaining stuff to me and teaching me when I did not have a clue. My God will bless him abundantly. There were others like Opard, who gave me useful tips, Icicles, who never stopped believing, Enniesams, who had my back all the way, Zibusiso, who made me laugh at times when I would have been crying hard. Even my Dad helped in his own way, cos I never went hungry.
Jehovah did it for me. In spite of my screw-ups, in spite of my sins, in spite of my unfaithfulness. He did it. He heard my prayers and answered them. He did not leave me to my own devises, nor did He punish me for my shortcomings.
Ah Lord, I don’t know what to say really, but i think a heart-felt thank you would suffice.
I give You absolutely all the credit.
Finally, I can write about it. It’s almost unbelievable. But God did it. He actually did it for me! Wow...I’m listening to the songs I always listened to when I was hoping and trusting that He would give me a miracle, and now He has.
You may wonder what I am going on about. It’s my final year result! I finished with a 2.1. Now you may not realise the importance of this, so I will explain it to you.
Because of my history, I have always had some sort of expectation bestowed upon me. I did not really think I would have a problem living up to this expectation, at least where academics are concerned. I’ll like to believe I’m not a dull babe, and school work has never been that much of an issue for me. But somehow, i got majorly distracted, and my grades were on an almost steady decline, for one reason or the other. I’m pretty sure it was because God had said that I will never fail, that’s why I never ended up with a flat zero, or any carry-overs. Trust me, I do not give myself any credit for whatever success I have had, it’s absolutely all God.
Anyway, in my year one, my result was pretty good. Did not quite reach a first class, but along the line, I think hopes of a first class flew out of the window for all of us, so we all strived to maintain, and attain good second class uppers.
In year 2, my result received a big slap! It was the first time we were experiencing law, and the way questions were answered was just weird! But it was a learning process, and even God was rooting for me. I remember my contract exam. It was horrid! Like, I did not remember any cases, everything just flew out of my head! As God would have it, the exam questions leaked, so we had to rewrite it. This time, I was ready. We had to read under the street lights because there was no light in the entire school. I’m sure I would have had a bold zero if we had not redone that exam.
Year 3 was probably the year with the worst results. It’s sad how I cannot look back at that year and remember anything concrete that I did or gained. I was just floating, like a directionless confused human being. My result could best be described as mediocre. Very. One good thing that I can remember now that I think about it is that that was the year I started talking to icicles. Now that was definitely a good thing.
Year 4 was somewhat better. I had good influence, a good man who was always pushing me to work. My results that year were markedly better, except for one course that tried to screw me over. Thank God for God.
Now year 5 is the year I will never ever forget. The first semester was okay, except for yet another course that wanted to mess me up. Second semester was...unbelievable. It had to have been my most turbulent semester, heck, the most turbulent time in my young life! I was such a wreck at some point, it was amazing. I went from being claustrophobic, to sad, to desperate, to depressed, to crazyish... But somehow or the other, God was there with me, every single step of the way, even when I did not know that He was. You know the amazing thing? He started answering my prayers before I really started praying. Like I heard that in my jurisprudence, I had the highest score in the test. When I heard, i was like, what? Are you sure? Cos I did not remember that test being fantastic at all. I remember just sha writing stories, hoping they would make sense. And somehow, they did. And then I remember my Evidence. God had to have sent Prof Osibajo, cos that man is one heck of a lecturer! Because of Him, I understood the topic, and I loved my exam. As in, I actually loved it! It’s one of those papers i think back on fondly! Who does that? I guess I do. Evidence...I will never forget you. And my project. Hmm... I had this ‘wonderful’ lady for my supervisor, the kind that you are afraid to talk too much in her presence in case she gets mad and takes it out on your grade. Mehn, the Lord sha found a way to do it for me. Imagine, she did not look at the final project, she graded based on my past mistakes in the work! She’s one of those people I hope I meet in future, when I’m all rich and powerful , and when she does not have any kind of power over me anymore.
All in all, I had help. The Lord sent me all kinds of help. One major source was Gbonka. I think he will forever be my friend. He was there at my lowest point. He helped me through the project, from the beginning to the end. He was there, hoping with me, believing that i could do it, explaining stuff to me and teaching me when I did not have a clue. My God will bless him abundantly. There were others like Opard, who gave me useful tips, Icicles, who never stopped believing, Enniesams, who had my back all the way, Zibusiso, who made me laugh at times when I would have been crying hard. Even my Dad helped in his own way, cos I never went hungry.
Jehovah did it for me. In spite of my screw-ups, in spite of my sins, in spite of my unfaithfulness. He did it. He heard my prayers and answered them. He did not leave me to my own devises, nor did He punish me for my shortcomings.
Ah Lord, I don’t know what to say really, but i think a heart-felt thank you would suffice.
I give You absolutely all the credit.
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